At the end of nine holes and at the end of my rope. Tilgate Golf Course was cut into a forrest, and swallowed 10 of my balls in nine holes. I cut my losses and called it a day. Didn't figure my five remaining balls would get me through the back.

Golf can be a frustrating game…..but it can also be a game of amazing satisfaction. The pendulum swings between frustration and satisfaction from shot to shot for some of us. But when you catch that one shot just perfect, when the ball clicks off the club face and explodes through the air, reaches its apex then drops softly near its intended target, THAT’S the shot that prevents the clubs from getting tossed into the pond and leaves me checking my calendar for my next possible round.

Not sure where the below caddy comments originated but gladly pass them along. I’m not opposed to caddies at all – in fact I love the idea – but since I’d probably hear a handful of these nearly every time out, why subject myself to the deserved humiliation. Easier to use a pull cart.

The 10 Best Caddy Replies

# 10 — Golfer: “Think I’m going to drown myself in the lake.”
Caddy:  ”Think you can keep your head down that long?”

# 9 — Golfer: “I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.”
Caddy: “Try heaven, you’ve already moved most of the earth.”

# 8 — Golfer: “Do you think my game is improving?”
Caddy: “Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now.”

# 7 — Golfer: “Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?”
Caddy: “Eventually.”

# 6 — Golfer: “You’ve got to be the worst caddy in the world.”
Caddy: “I don’t think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence.

# 5 — Golfer: “Please stop checking your watch all the time. It’s too
much of A distraction.”
Caddy: “It’s not a watch – it’s a compass.”

# 4 — Golfer: “How do you like my game?”
Caddy: “Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf.

# 3 — Golfer: “Do you think it’s a sin to play on Sunday?”
Caddy: “The way you play, sir, it’s a sin on any day.”

# 2 — Golfer: “This is the worst course I’ve ever played on.”
Caddy: “This isn’t the golf course. We left that an hour ago.”

# 1 — Best Caddy Comment……………..
Golfer: “That can’t be my ball, it’s too old.”
Caddy: “It’s been a long time since we teed off, sir.”

I am amazed at the hypocrisy of the people who stand in judgment of Tiger – which is everyone who has felt superior to him based on some sense of personal moral righteousness. (I touched on this in my previous post about Tiger Woods and Christmas). I do not condone Tiger’s actions; what he did is inexcusable. But I wonder how the rest of us would have handled the skill, money, power, and access to so many willing accomplices. In one regard the rest of  us have the great luxery of never knowing the same pressures because there is only one person in the world in such a unique position: Tiger. The irony is that the rest of us fail in so many other ways, falling just as far short of the expectations God has for us and nobody bats and eye lash. We say, “Well I have my warts, but at least I’m not as bad as Tiger.” Actually, you are a lot worse than you think. Romans 3:23 says “all have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory.” Even a single “little” sin makes us a gigantic spiritual failure in the eyes of God.

With so many people picking up stones it is worth a reminder that Jesus said “He who is without sin can cast the first stone.” Tiger has to live with himself and the consequences of what he’s done and doubtful anyone will be as hard on Tiger as he will be on himself. Unfortunately, all the therapy in the world isn’t going to remove his fundamental problem. Only repentance found in Jesus, believing He is the perfect substitute to receive punishment due us will free Tiger – and anyone else – from the bondage of sinful hearts.

(Note: posted an update located here on Feb 19 after Tiger’s press conference.)

I’m a Tiger Woods groupie (well, not in the most recently reported sense). I guess I should say I have been a groupie in the golf sense since he won his last U.S. Amateur titled and blew onto the PGA tour in the mid 90s. I’ll never forget the putt on the first hole of a three hole playoff with Bob May at the 2000 PGA Championships. He charged after the putt pointing it – willing it – into the hole. Amazing.

Of course Tiger is now totally disgraced, the butt of  jokes and today sits on a boat floating somewhere near the Bahamas. His sexcapades are the talk of tabloids and mainstream media. Whereas many people couldn’t touch him on a golf course, they now liberally fire condescending criticism at him with the accuracy Tiger fires at difficult pin placements on Sundays at majors. I find it all to be pious and self-righteous.

I can’t seem to get Tiger off my mind, probably because we bought a Wii and Tiger Woods 2010 the day before news broke of his “traffic accident.” Every time I play I think about what the guy accomplished and about what has been flushed down the toilet. It reminds me how close I am to flushing my life down the toilet because of the carnal nature that battles for prominence in my life. Wish I could say I was an exception, but there really is nothing exceptional about the evil inclinations in the human heart. Whether we admit it or not there is a bit of Tiger in us all. In fact, we don’t know – and if we did are totally unwilling to admit – what we are capable of. “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” (Jeremiah 17:9). Paul spends the first three chapters of Romans talking about the sickness of the human heart and spends a good part of Chapter 5 explaining to us the spring from which our sin flows. Our hearts have been wicked nearly from the beginning, which makes us enemies with a holy God. He cannot allow it, has to punish it, and spiritually filthy people can’t do anything about it. What are we to do?

Absolutely nothing, except repent and believe.

God did something on our behalf and this is why I can’t think of Tiger without thinking of Christmas. An angel appears to some shepherds and speaks the most significant words ever spoken – words Tiger needs to hear: “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord” (Luke 2:10-11). If God is to save Tiger – or you, or me – there had to be Christmas. He didn’t have to send Jesus to this world as a baby to grow to a man to die for the sins of the world, but in extravagant love he chose to. Literally, Immanuel, God with us. The good news of Christmas is that a Savior was born. The good news of Christmas is that regardless of what Tiger has done he can be set free from his sin. So can you.

Yes, it is easy to fire heat seeking missiles at Tiger, but what we each need is to – in great humility – admit we are spiritual failures – like Tiger – and this Christmas embrace the good news of a born Savior.

My first golf outing here in the UK. Course is narrow and short, putting a premium on well placed shots. The biggest challenge may be avoiding the dog poop and pedestrians milling about the public grounds upon which the private course sits.

One year ago Friday (Nov. 6) I received a phone call asking if we’d be “interested in throwing some things in a crate” and move overseas. Total shock would be the best way to describe my response. I pushed away from my desk, thoughts spinning, until I could catch my breath. When I did I rolled forward to my keyboard, opened a Web browser, pulled up Google and entered what any other clear-thinking, priority driven human being would surely have searched: GOLF COURSES NEAR REIGATE ENGLAND.

BOOM! Like stars lighting up the night sky dozens of little red balloons populated my Google map. One year to the day later I teed it up at the Reigate and Redhill Golf Course. A private course on public land. Not sure what that means other than you have to watch for the pedestrians roaming around the course like strolling through a park. And in the UK  where there are pedestrians roaming there are dogs roaming. Where there are dogs, there is dog poop. At least the course rules allow for it as noted on the back of the scorecard:

Proof for a particular friend of mine that I can actually hit a green. I did four times, in regulation. Kind of a big deal for me.

“FREE DROP: If animal droppings (with the exception of rabbits), interfere with a player’s stance or playing of the shot anywhere on the Course, the ball may be lifted, cleaned and dropped within one club-length, not nearer the hole, without penalty.”

Unfortunately, there were no course exceptions for six balls I hit among the ever-pervasive, golf-ball consuming gorse bushes prominent here in Western Europe.